on my birthday....and realisation....that HE is around....

watching 'Queen of Lunch Time Cuisine' the whole freaking box until i finished them this morning at about 6.30 am!! hehehee....

but wat came to my realisation was the male protagonist in the story, well, there are actually two of them (somewhat of a typical love triangle scenario) but i like both of them & i can actually felt how the female protagonist feels in this (played by the wonderful yuko takeuchi!)

how much yosuke eguchi resembled somebody that i am somewhat afraid to face create a chism in my emotions tat i was so afraid to show.....he reminded me so much of the guy in my dreams (people, its not 'dream guy' literally here but i actually dreamt a guy looked like him....i guess la) technically of course! he had the hair, the physique....*sigh*

but is it him??? i'm confused....i just got this gut feeling tat i am gonna meet this guy soon & GOD, i'm freaking scared....its bad tat i've had dreams about him except i dun get to see his face!! yeah, how do i know its yosuke eguchi?? i never said its him, only he looks like HIM!! seriously scary la....even typing this is giving me the goose bumps.....

i dunno why am i feeling this way?? why am i so bloody 'attached' to him?? someone whom i have never met....but only dreamt about....and due to that, i can't have a normal relationship wif anyone....seriously.....damn.....thinking about tat guy is driving me nuts!!! but hopefully, i don't think i'd like to meet him....i'm just !$%#^@#^ scared alrite??? not ready to face him yet.....and yet somehow, i feel like as if we've got some kind of connection.....is it karma or wat??

on the quarter-age life crisis & upcoming birthday...

great....

february is in the corner....yup, tat means tat i'm gonna be another year older.....wat can i contemplate being a 27 year old & doin' her degree & not finished her studies yet??? can i feel envious of my friends??? how droll.....

so, wat on earth am i going to do then?? my friends are insisting that i get married.....ASAP!!! gosh!! wat u think i am?? some cattle off for auction?? i'd rather contemplate suicide than enslaved myself to the institution known as 'marriage'.....i'm sure most of my friends wud understand my utter feelings and sarcasm (mind the sarcasm) in regards to the idea of marriage & family.....

i am getting older....damn....i'm not worried about my current status quo per se but in actuality, i'm worried tat i look like some old crone!!! yuuuuupppp....exactly is......

i dunno wat i'm going to get for my birthday but i sure dun look too happy about it....i know i like presents (dun we all??? ^.^)

damn....its too depressing to even type this down.....i hate my birthdays.....i can bet for sure tat my parents are going to forget them again.....tats so heartaching.....(yeah rite!!)

an annoying yet boring day until.....

after nearly a week of looking after my spoilt brat of a cat Sarsi, he's getting much better now, thank GOD for that!! nearly bought a large nice box from Hallmark as his coffin!!! (gosh no!!) Sarsi is a survivor & i'm freakin' proud of him, GOD must've love him a lot too.....

[you guys are just looking at the picture huh?? i knew it wud get your attention!]

unlike the title of my posting today, i've been surfing the net not only for information regarding my assignments (yup...haven't got to doing it yet...procrastination seemed to be my specialty) & also having fun looking up pictures and other tools for making websites......let me skip that part of my 'boring' activity.....until something caught my attention when looking for some materials!

seriously i didn't realised until i've crossed upon 'hentai' i didn't know that they made seriously good artwork using....*you know what i mean!* it was very very interesting & i had the whole night surfing and studying what hentai is all about! isn't tat amazing?? do i sound odd to everybody?? i like some of the artworks, it was beautiful! and can you believe it that it was drawn by women?? astounding....i continued my research on hentai like its a new kind of addiction.....sorry, no pun intended & if anybody feels offended.....i don't bloody care....its my fascination....not yours to begin with!

although its fun & relatively amusing, i also find it much more erotic than the conventional porn or blue films that were circulated around the girls hostel (yeah, even girls do WATCH it alright?? i wonder why you guys all get riled up bcoz of tat??)

i don't know why they'd call it hentai in the first place, its sounds so...so...derogatory & degrading but on my personal opinion, its clearly beautiful artwork done by professional artists....hey, if michaelangelo's David is considered master artwork....why not these hentais?? hmmm....the world is still typically conventional isn't it?? we're still not ready to change despite the wave of globalisation hitting us.....

so, anybody for hentai??